Rais hurt by ‘Yorais’ jokes, plans to sue internet

RAIS: Young and hip

KUALA LUMPUR — Minister for Information, Communications, Arts and Culture Datuk Seri Utama Dr. Rais Yatim today stated that he is deeply offended by the jokes circulating about his age and announced that he will be taking legal action against the internet for what he termed as ‘a concerted effort to humiliate a young-at-heart person like me’.

It all started with a sincere advise from a well-meaning, concerned leader. But now, it has spawned a malicious and personal internet campaign that would shame anyone. And being at the receiving end of the humiliating treatment, Rais is not planning to take it lying down.

Weeks ago, Rais gave Malaysian internet users a sound advice. He said that Malaysians, especially Muslims, must avoid being totally immersed in the internet culture, especially Facebook and Twitter, adding that facilities like the internet could not be accepted wholly because it was a form of business introduced by the West and “Malaysians were just users.”

“We are not saying that they cannot use Facebook or Twitter but when using such facilities they must upkeep the values taught by Islam, Buddhism or Christianity to maintain our culture,” he told reporters after opening a Seminar on the 1Malaysia concept in Seremban.

Unfortunately, however, his sincere caution was received poorly by internet-using Malaysians, who started a Twitter and online campaign called ‘Yorais’, modelled from the ‘Yo Mama’ jokes. They began a barrage of Yorais jokes, which poked fun at his not-so-young outlook on life.

“I’ll have you all know that I’m not that old,” said Rais, thumping his chest. “I am a lot younger than many of these people think. Fine, I’ve lived through two world wars, but who hasn’t?

“They are falsely saying that I predate dinosaurs and the Jurassic era. Obviously they exaggerated. I mean, a major meteor deep impact event wiped out the dinosaurs. Now, if the dinosaurs were killed by the impact and ensuing global winter, and if I were around back then, wouldn’t I have been killed too? Use your logic!” said the minister, agitated.

“Those irresponsible Twitter people have no evidence to support what they said in that malicious campaign designed to discredit me,” he continued. “To say that I’m so old that I knew Burger King when he was still a prince? Where’s the proof? Did they get Burger King to sign a statutory declaration? Of course not! If they did, I haven’t seen it yet.”

“I’m very upset. I see this as an attack on my personal being. It’s not my fault I’m not as young as they’d like me to be. I can’t help it if at the time I was born, Australia was still part of the main Asian continent land mass. All I know is that I am still very much relevant to every Malaysian, being still young and hip,” he stressed. “Such lies! Don’t believe the online people! Online people are liars!

“That is why I will take action to protect my fellow Malaysians against the scourge of the internet. This… internet fellow — and its evil agents like Facebook and Twitter — are the West’s weapons to destroy the 1Malaysia harmony we currently enjoy in the country,” he added.

“I have spoken to my lawyers, and we plan to sue the internet, Facebook and Twitter for a grand total of RM100 million. Yes, yes. That will teach the internet a lesson. This will bury the internet. Yes.

“And it wouldn’t matter if the lawsuit goes on and on for many years. I’m still young.”

30 Comments

Filed under National News

30 responses to “Rais hurt by ‘Yorais’ jokes, plans to sue internet

  1. 100% pure humorous gold. Excellently written!

  2. siew eng

    yeah, sue those ageists!

    new tweet – #gorais!

  3. SoddenCold

    wow.. now, wasnt that just hilarious!! i almost fell outta my chair reading that!! ROTF!!!

  4. DizzieLizzie

    i laughed and i laughed and i laughed… this man obviously doesnt think before he speaks.

  5. Blade

    ROTFLMFAO…..i swear this is way better than any yorais joke on twitter man…pure gold….

  6. Can we just live dinosaurs and artifacts to where they belong? And preferably in their era. Get smart.

  7. si

    ‘sue the internet’ ??? err… !? how does that work? lol !

  8. #yorais is so old that when he was still in school, ‘History’ was called “Current Affairs”

    LOL

  9. Claire

    He obviously doesnt know how internet works. How can u sue Internet????? goshhhhhhhh. stop speaking and save yourself some dignity!!!!!!

  10. young at heart

    this is ridiculous…sue the internet?? Rais rebuttle makes him look even worse. he is trying to justify the insuslts with logic?? come on its a joke …young people accept jokes….faceook has done more good than the information misnistry has ever done. Recently, 6000 Israelies and Palestinians connected on facebook to discuss and petition the violence. This is something phenominal and would have never occured otherwise.
    Seriously man…..go ahead and sue and bankrupt the internet.

    • frake

      you know this is a joke right? no need to get worked up about it. i mean, only a total idiot with an IQ less than 50 would believe this AND not notice the giant banner saying how NOT true it is.

  11. Melissa

    Hhahahaha, i love that there are actually ppl in Malaysia who can write satire :)) it’s a damn funny and genius piece, but the problem is that the majority of Malaysians still don’t get the concept!! So many ppl are freaking out over this piece and Jerome Martin’s piece on TMI… SIGH!!

    Why la we so frickin’ self-righteous and serious all the time? It’s not like all these armchair critics are doing anything to actually make the world better, they just read endless news articles and talk at the mamak. So if that’s okay, why is a harmless comic piece SUCH a big deal to these ppl?

    Jeez, that’s why we don’t have an SNL-type show here😉 We take ourselves too seriously! But anyway, thanks for the piece cuz it made me laugh this morning :))

  12. Ooooh, makes me shiver to know I was part of the #yorais revolution… Hahah…

    You’ve got a keen sense of humour. I like!

    The video summary of #yorais that I uploaded garnered about 2,000 views in a mere day – shows how powerful social media is (and how much we dislike our jurassic-thinking ministers).

  13. Lefty

    “this is ridiculous…sue the internet?? Rais rebuttle makes him look even worse. he is trying to justify the insuslts with logic??”

    Adoii.. why la some people so gullible? this is spoof news la..

  14. Paul Chua

    You might as well just sue God while you’re at it

  15. i thought it was a joke that was written by someone when i read his reply.

  16. john

    this about tops all yorais jokes unless, there’s a somehow lost manuscript that beats them all!

  17. Victoria

    Alamak, is Rais living in the 21st century or not??? His reply just confirm what they said about him….err….dino..ur

  18. Steve

    I found in 2007 he commented people sue malaysia over rasa sayang being unrealistic. Any idea to link that up with this. Some creative mind might be able to write one and top this. Ha ha ha

  19. tricia

    ala kesian rais….people bully you ah?hahahahhahahahahhahahaha how stupid can this man get????dear god!help this man!hahahaha

  20. #yorais is laughed at some people here who are too stupid for not being able to get the idea that the above ‘news’ is just a spoof

  21. Berjaya bought Friendster, so we can only use Friendster coz Malaysian owns it?

  22. Stalker Fairy

    ““I am a lot younger than many of these people think. Fine, I’ve lived through two world wars, but who hasn’t?”

    …..uh….those who passed away before and those born after the 40s?

    Also, suing the internet is like suing the world. Like Paul Chua said, he might as well sue God.

  23. adamJ

    Rais stays with the dinosaurs? I didn’t know that..Damn! I thought he existed even before there were dinosaurs!

  24. Pingback: Happy 47th birthday, Malaysia!

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