MPs to wear GPS ankle tags to combat absenteeism

NAJIB: Disappointed with absent MPs

KUALA LUMPUR — Prime Minister Datuk Seri Najib Tun Abdul Razak today announced that all members of parliament would be required to wear permanent ankle tags with global positioning capabilities, in line with the government’s efforts to ensure that MPs attend parliament sittings. This is due to a close call a couple of days ago when the 2010 Budget narrowly escaped being rejected, with 66 BN MPs voting for it, while 63 Pakatan MPs against. BN has 140 MPs in total while Pakatan, 82.

At a packed Press conference outside Dewan Rakyat, Najib said that the move was necessary to counter rising absenteeism in parliament sittings.

“I’ve always tolerated members of parliament who need to skip the sittings once in a while, perhaps to attend to affairs in their constituencies,” said the PM. “But when an MP is missing half the time, then he or she’s just makan gaji buta (getting money for nothing).”

Najib added that with the US-made device, no MP would be able to lie about where they are, since their location would be monitored by a newly set up task force under the minister in charge of parliament, Datuk Seri Mohd Nazri Abdul Aziz.

“We’d be able to tell if an MP is playing truant. The device can pinpoint exactly where they are, so if they say they can’t make it to a sitting because they’re busy helping some poor farmer get his buffalo out from some dried mudhole, they’d better not be fibbing. We’d know if they’re having a massage in some hotel or catching New Moon at a cineplex,” stressed the BN chairman.

NO ESCAPE FOR YANG BERHORMAT: The GPS ankle tag

Najib also said that, if need be, he would order the country’s spy satellites to monitor and capture the image of the MPs and their wherabouts.

“This would only be reserved to the hard-core absentees, of course. Like how the traffic police uses cameras to catch road offenders in action, we’d do the same with our errant MPs. In fact, here’s an example of such aerial spy images, taken just five minutes ago,” said the PM, showing a screenshot of an MP from Negri Sembilan having a smoke outside the parliament building. “As you can see, with such details, no MP would be able to lie about their activities. Heck, you can even tell the brand of the ciggie he’s holding!”

Asked if the GPS monitoring system can really get the MPs to attend sittings, Najib admitted that simply monitoring is not enough and that better enforcement is necessary.

“We’re considering some punitive actions against MPs who still don’t attend sittings,” said Najib. “These people are paid to not just serve their constituencies and campaign for re-elections, but also to work as parliamentarians formulating national policies. That means they have to spend some quality time in the House.

“There are several options, ranging from warning memos to pay deductions. My personal recommendation for these hard-core absentees is to add on remote-controlled electric shocks to their tags. The kind you find in Taser guns. After 3 cases of unwarranted absence, BZOOTT! he laughed.

“That’ll motivate them to attend sittings.”

21 Comments

Filed under National News

21 responses to “MPs to wear GPS ankle tags to combat absenteeism

  1. hanisma

    There is no necessity for MPs to wear GPS if they are really ‘genuine’ MPs – responsible and with integrity. The world will be laughing at us, dear Najib, for having such a bunch of irresponsible MPs through your making!

  2. Tan Jo

    nice one! =D

    Imagine how that’ll spoil the MP’s chances of having affairs without their wives knowing now that they can be tracked via GPS (think Chua Soi Lek) =P

  3. eow_eow

    wonder who is next on the list to make some money out of some screwy govt idea.

  4. Ibat

    It might as well be true!! The way MPs treat their responsibilities is absurd to say the least.

  5. nxforget

    The wives of those MP’s and ADUN sure love the idea. They can track their hubby’s where about.

    I, too, like the idea. At least, there’s no more excuse that YB not available. 😀

  6. If they are not honest to attend to what they are paid for then they should be sacked by their parties be it BN or PR. We need honest MPs to attend Parliment. If you find the job to taxing than don’t stand for elections cause we the rakyaat are not going to give your morons a free lunch

  7. StraightTalking

    Nose4news, you’ll become a multi-millionaire very soon. Just wait for the 8pm Bulletin Utama for Najib’s announcement.

    According to his press secretary, a copy of the speech text which was given to me, the PM says that Nose4news has been appointed to head his PR department and an initial consulting fee of RM45 million will be appropriated to Nose4news in the coming week.

    Apparently the PM’s decision to award the lucrative job to Nose4news is in its ability to con millions of Malaysia Today readers with articles stolen from the PM’s residence in Putrajaya.

  8. Peakof Insanity

    Nice one! The wives’ club would surely love the idea!! ;P

  9. mas

    wah like prison break movie ah malaysia boleh who paid the gadget aah

  10. wow

    Good idea. Let the wives do the enforcement. They will make sure the MPs will be where they say. No more gatal session. No more sneaking out to have a quickie .

  11. lee wee tak

    if a MP needs to be controlled like that, why vote him or her in in ther first place?

    i think if this ever is implemented, just wonder who is the supplier and how many times above market rate we tax payers are gonna pay for it?

  12. StraightTalking

    Good one Hassan! It gives us a good idea who are the “thinking” readers and who are the imposters masquerading as serious readers chewing up everything they read. These are the tunnel vision spectators who think that pussies are furry animals with long tails and cocks are alarm clocks to wake you up every morning.

    Keep ’em coming!!

  13. Chester Khuan

    I know Malaysia have launched a few satellites but do we have spy satellites up there? If not then does that mean we need to beg the US to take that “ciggie” picture for us?

    Is this a belated April Fools Day article?

  14. audie61

    good one. absolutely love thsi posts

  15. Siew

    Wa.. After the relocation of Sabah and Sarawak article, and the Ultraman post, people are still commenting here like they believe this.

    When I read the post title, I knew it was feasible enough to have some idiots think that Najib would try this. I clicked the comments tab with a very real sense of dread. Epic dumb.

    Almost makes me feel like voting government next election, seeing the kind of company i’ll be having in the opposition camp.

  16. Oh my God! This is against human rights! What kind of people would ankle-strap theose poor politicians?

  17. I needed this, thanks for sharing this information.

  18. maddy

    what kind of fool would ask ‘is this true?’
    i cant imagine people would think that way. that is so beyond imaginary stupidity!

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